Living the Dream (and Losing Your Mind): The Blessing Paradox

It’s not burnout — it’s blessing fatigue. We share a raw and honest reflection on how the responsibilities tied to your dreams can sometimes feel like too much. If you’ve ever felt guilty for feeling stressed by the life you love, this episode will help you reframe it.

Chapters

• 0:00 Morning Chaos and Garage Door Mishap
• 5:46 Chaos From The Blessings We Asked For
• 8:23 Finding Balance With Boundaries
• 14:31 Gratitude Transforms Your Perspective
• 16:40 Higher Dose Sponsor Break
• 19:06 True Wealth Beyond Bank Accounts
• 22:11 Appreciating Chaos as Evidence of Blessings

Transcript

Jaclyn
Hello, hello, hello, and welcome to The Freq Show. I'm Jaclyn Steele Thurmond. This is my husband, Sam Thurmond, and we are here today to bring you some high frequency content if I look like I'm sitting awkwardly, I am. I'm 8 months pregnant and I'm uncomfortable.

Sam
Yeah, I'm just awkward.

Jaclyn
Yeah you are sometimes okay, we'll take it away since this is since you came up with this episode idea.

Sam
Okay well yeah it's it was spurred on by this morning's events so I think you're always on me for keeping the thread through the episode cause I can kind of go off in different directions but the thread for this episode in particular is how the chaos that we experience in life is due much in part to the blessings that we asked for okay so that's the thread

Jaclyn
I love that, okay, alright!

Sam
So starting with the story from this morning, we have a bit of a routine, you know that we normally follow during weekdays with our son, and just what time he gets up, how we start getting him ready to go to school, and,

Jaclyn
We have a quiet time with him every morning, so its very slow.

Sam
And that sort of thing, and you know, sometimes it goes to plan, sometimes it does not, depending on the mood that he wakes up in that day or if we wake up on time or whatever, but this morning for whatever reason was a little bit hectic, I'll say.

Jaclyn
He was a crab apple.

Sam
Yeah he was in a mood so he didn't wanna get up he didn't wanna eat breakfast yada yada doing all of that kind of stuff I had gotten up and worked out before he woke up and was ready to kind of hit the ground running and be productive and get some good work done today and what started happening it was just one of those mornings where things started to hit early you know I was getting phone calls we're running out of a rental property so I was talking to tenants we have some new deals coming in on the commercial side so I was talking to some sellers and a partner on that you have current clients you have new clients you're eight months pregnant so just.

Jaclyn
Yeah I had a contractor calling me this morning, a cabinet guy, and then a draftsman for another project.

Sam
Yeah.

Jaclyn
And then text messages too this was all before like 9:15.

Sam
Right, yeah, it's like during coffee.

Jaclyn
Yeah.

Sam
Yeah, or before coffee was over.

Jaclyn
Oh, we don't do well, guys don't call us before we have our coffee.

Sam
Yeah so we're late I'm late getting out the door taking Roman to school just hung up on the phone with a tenant then I had a seller call me about an RV park and motel that we're going to do which is awesome out in Idaho but I was in between phone calls getting him loaded up he's crabby you know we're pulling out the door I'm trying to answer my phone and as I back out of the garage I slam into the garage door cause I didn't give it enough time to open as I was backing out and then you know just all hell breaks loose at that point I'm yelling at myself getting out assessing the damage and just it didn't do like thankfully didn't do a ton of damage but you know it really it scratched up the top of our car and kind of pulled the back window and I'm just standing out there with my head down and hands on my hips and just mad at myself cause I was just trying to do too much all at once and the whole morning was like that it was just overwhelming but thankfully my lovely wife you came out and instead of getting upset with me and yelling at me or being pissed off 'cause we if you listen to the last couple episodes we've had expensive car months with repairs and now all of a sudden this and we just repaired the garage door too so but thankfully you were so like graceful in that moment and you could see how mad I was at myself and just so frustrated that you know you didn't light into me at all you were just kind of like you know.

Jaclyn
You were beating yourself up enough for the both of us.

Sam
Yeah.

Jaclyn
And I've done dumb stuff like that too, we all have so I think having Grace in moments like that for ourselves and for our partners.

Sam
Yeah.

Jaclyn
It's not gonna help if I go “What did you do, Sam?!”

Sam
Yeah, so that was helpful in that moment it helped me calm down a little bit so anyway I take Roman to school still frustrated with myself come home come in and talk to you and we talk through it a little bit and come to the realization that it's not that big a deal we have so many blessings in life but what that did was it made me start thinking about that and all the things in the morning that were causing this chaos and causing me to flail and just kind of be all over the place they are all a result of all the things that we asked for and all the things that we wanted you know we wanted kids we have a three year old we have a new  baby on the way we  wanted these commercial opportunities we wanted the design clients we wanted all this stuff that we now have but are also now dealing with all the time and energy that those blessings require and so the perspective is you know when you want the thing all you're focused on is getting the thing and how great it's gonna be to have the thing and it is but we don't you don't really think about all of the stuff that comes along with the things.

Jaclyn
The logistics.

Sam
The logistics, the task,s the energy, the time, the just chaos, you know, but I think taking a minute and stepping back and saying all of these things that were causing me this anxious energy this morning are all incredible blessings.

Jaclyn
Huge blessings.

Same
Yeah, they're it's everything that we've wanted.

Jaclyn
Our vision board has come to life, and can you imagine if you were God and you had these children that were like, hey they've been praying for this and this and this and this, I give it to them, and then they complain about it.

Sam
Yeah.

Jaclyn
So I just always want to be self aware enough to say Hey, even though this thing that I asked for has some complications that go along with it, that's just life, and that's growth, and that's finding our growth edge.

Sam
Yeah.

Jaclyn
And I wanna be self aware enough to go, God, thank you so much for these too, because I'm gonna learn through the difficulties more than I'm gonna learn through things that are easy so.

Sam
Yeah, and I think that is the right perspective and that's the message of today's podcast is taking that inventory of everything that's going on in your life because I too have that tendency to just be like you know I get a big blessing and it but it brings all of these requirements along with it so one don't expect your blessing to not come with some strings attached you know what I mean but two when you get that thing or when you're close to getting that thing don't lose yourself in all the to do's and all of the things that need to be done to just to have it you know what I mean because we have to be coming from a perspective of man I would never want to have a life where I didn't have our son or where we didn't have our new baby on the way or where we didn't you know sacrifice and make the decisions that we made and have are growing the businesses that we have today or have each other marriage is no different you know marriage is definitely comes with strengths you know.

Jaclyn
Like what?

Sam
You know I'm not, I stepped in one there, but you know what I mean, every all of these blessings takes work.

Jaclyn
Relationships take work and marriage takes work I think you know to piggyback off of what you just said something that has helped me and really this is only in the last year that I feel like I've implemented this well and having a child has helped so much because part of it is out of necessity but having boundaries around when I'm working and when I'm resting and what I mean by that is you know when I wake up in the morning that time is so sacred I get up with Roman I have my water with electrolytes and colostrum and pearl powder I have breakfast I'm very specific I have my coffee with all of the accoutrement in my coffee and I read and I do my affirmations and I pray and I need that to set the tone of my day and I also cherish that time with Roman because he is always like mom after you make your coffee we're gonna have a cuddle puddle right and so I wanna have that time with him and then you know he goes to school we have our work day and then at the end of the work day I don't always do this I'm imperfect about it but I really try and turn it off and make dinner and enjoy our evening and I wanna be present with you and I wanna be present with Roman and so having good boundaries around our immense blessings yeah also really helps me to put things in perspective in a healthy way.

Sam
Yeah.

Jaclyn
You know and I think going back to the foundational elements if you are feeling overwhelmed and you're listening to this are you sleeping are you taking care of yourself are you exercising what kind of foods are you eating and what vibration do they bring with them because high vibrational foods breed high vibrational energy right so getting back to basics and anytime we are overwhelmed understanding like yes these are incredible blessings but also we may be viewing them through the lens of overwhelm because we're tired like this week we're a little bit tired and we talked about that 20 minutes ago before starting the podcast we've had a couple of busy weekends and amazing things going on again so much to be grateful for but it doesn't mean that it doesn't leave you depleted.

Sam
Yeah and I think your point on having like the boundaries and a routine is really really important and I actually put in here the flip side of that is if that routine gets thrown off not allowing that to compound itself because I know in the morning like I've been getting up working out and then kind of ready to hit the ground running.

Jaclyn
Yes, you have.

Sam
But a lot of times, if we're running behind getting running to school or whatever it is I can feel like that tension inside me building up

Jaclyn
Anxiety building up.

Sam
Because I'm not sticking to my sticking to my plan and sticking to the routine and that's all it is it's not that I can't adjust and can't recognize that you know I'm still gonna be able to get everything done that I need and want to get done today but just because it's not going exactly according to plan I start to get anxious and antsy and I wanna start doing a better job of recognizing that and one just kind of letting it go getting back on track back on the routine you know as quickly as possible but a lot of times it's just impossible to stick to that and I think for me it's important not to let that compound on everything else that's going on and the thing have the thing that I put in place to create some peace and some margin and structure allow that thing to now cause more stress you know.

Jaclyn
Giving ourselves Grace I just finished a book by Tony Robbins called unshakeable and it's about financial well being and being unshakeable financially but at the end it has this part about money psychology and he talks about how you can have you can live in a beautiful state or a state of suffering and it's always our choice and the easiest way to go from a state of suffering to a beautiful state is through gratitude and just feeling deeply deeply grateful for all of the blessings in your life.

Sam
Yeah.

Jaclyn
And I couldn't agree more with this I think I really discovered this when we moved to Georgia and I was struggling with that that transition and I started really focusing on like I'm so grateful for the bed I have to sleep in I'm so grateful for the roof over my head I'm so grateful for the food in the fridge I'm so grateful for the opportunities that I have even if it doesn't look exactly like I want it to look right now focusing on the gratitude changed everything and it allowed me to put high frequency energy into the things that I did want to build.

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Sam
I thought that insight that you shared from your lunch with the.

Jaclyn
With the ladies?

Sam
From with the ladies was really insightful and that kind of stuck with me when you were talking about building you know more financial freedom and wealth and so forth and so on and she was she kind of looked at you and was like you're already wealthy like you're wealthy in family you're wealthy in health you're wealthy in your home and that kind of that resonated with me because we are

Jaclyn
It's such a beautiful piece of wisdom from my friend Jonelle, so if you're listening, Jonelle, thank you!

Sam
Yeah, I think we put too much focus on wanting to accomplish and wanting to achieve, and you know, build the bank account, and not enough focus on what we have and where we are, so immensely wealthy in those things that really matter.

Jaclyn
Oh I mean again in that in the book by Tony Robbins at the end he was talking to a billionaire and Tony I forget the question Tony asked him but something about wealth and this billionaire said I know so many billionaires who are poor in their quality of life they're not happy they you know he was talking about how the wealthiest people are wealthy because of the state of their minds not the state of their bank accounts.

Sam
Yeah!

Jaclyn
And I completely agree, and I do think that they're related, you know there's a certain amount of money you wanna have to just feel stable and be able to relax, but at the same time, it really always does come back to the mind.

Sam
Yeah.

Jaclyn
And where we place our focus, where we focus our energy flows, yeah, if we're focusing on lack, that's exactly what's gonna happen, if we're focusing on all that we already have, there's a very good chance we'll have more.

Sam
Yeah, Rogan talks about that how you know once you get past the point where you're not really worried about how much the dinner's gonna cost when you go out to eat like when that's not a huge issue to you once you're past that point you're kind of over the hump you know what I mean in a lot of ways.

Jaclyn
Yeah, that's a good litmus test. Think of how many dinners we've been like how much is this gonna be

Sam
Yeah now

Jaclyn
They bring out the check, and you're like $#!*!

Sam
When you go to dinner in Scottsdale, in a lot of places it's still kind of like eesh, but

Jaclyn
Yeah, they bring out that $300 bill, and you're like, "What did we order?!”

Sam
Yeah but as it relates to I think everything you said is totally on point but just I think when we talk about building wealth and this goes back to another episode that we did about you know how it's cliche but it really is the journey and who you're becoming in the journey and I think if we if money is the focus for the sake of money for the sake of things and for the sake of being able to say you have this amount of money or this house or this car it's going to be going to be fruitless in the end.

Jaclyn
It's gonna be so empty.

Sam
If money is a focus because of who it's going to make us in the process of achieving the goals.

Jaclyn
And what we're going to be able to build.

Sam
Yeah.

Jaclyn
And provide.

Sam
Yeah because who you're becoming in that process is going to determine your level of contentment and joy happiness once you achieve the thing so it's super important but to stick to the thread I think that the big the big takeaway today one I'm thankful I'm not thankful that I scratched up the car and dinged it up but what I am thankful is to take something like that and learn from it and what I learned from it was to 1 take a beat take a breath.

Jaclyn
Open the garage door before you.

Sam
Open the garage door.

Jaclyn
Before you back it out.

Sam
But definitely that but to put into perspective when I'm busy and feeling overwhelmed and feeling like sometimes you can feel like you're failing I think when I'm feeling like that is taking stock and looking at what is causing all this stuff obviously we want to minimize the amount of chaos that we have but it's going to happen especially when there are new things and we're doing new things and bigger things but taking stock of that and really it was just so interesting to look back and say man all the things that are causing me stress this morning are all the things that I would hate to not have in my life right now you know so thankful to have that little lesson

Jaclyn
I feel that same I feel the same I feel it like I have so many projects going on right now and I'm like am I failing at this am I failing at this am I failing at this but the reality is these are all projects I wanna do there's just a lot of them and so I feel pulled in different directions.

Sam
Yeah.

Jaclyn
But again, that's a blessing.

Sam
Yeah, and you wanna do a good job.

Jaclyn
And I wanna do a fantastic job.

Sam
Yeah and you will and that's a good litmus test if you go through that process of evaluating what's causing all the hurry in your life and it's all things that you want wanted and they're all blessings in your life that's a great place to be that's because you could be you know you could be stressing over a job that you hate or you know a relationship that is.

Jaclyn
Not good.

Sam
Not worth it or not good or not aligned, whatever

Jaclyn
And you're definitely worth it.

Sam
Absolutely, as are you awkward moment.

Jaclyn
For you.

Sam
But yeah, I think it was just.

Jaclyn
I think we can close.

Sam
A good lesson this morning.

Jaclyn
Yeah, I think we can close out with the question.

Sam
Okay, Well my question to you guys is basically to pose exactly what we talked through here today take a second if you're feeling overwhelmed and take inventory of the things that are causing you to feel that way and find the blessings in that what are what is making you busy is it your family is it your friends is it your job is it your business and pull out those things that are at the core and recognize them as the blessings they are and shift your focus shift your energy to where you can now look at the busyness and the chaos and be grateful.

Jaclyn
I love it, okay, thank you for listening, and we will catch you in next week's episode!


Thank you so much for listening to The Freq Show with Sam Thurmond and me, Jaclyn Steele Thurmond. We would love to connect with you via our website, beckonliving.com, and on social media.
You can find us on Instagram and TikTok @beckonliving, and you can join our email list to receive uplifting messages, podcast, and business updates, and discounts on High Frequency products just for our freqy community.

Cheers to High Frequency Living!